An idealist is one who, on noticing that roses smell better than a cabbage, concludes that it will also make better soup.

...A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin.
- H. L. Mencken



My car smells great. I stopped a few days ago to buy the cedar garlands we string around the front porch every year about this time, and the back seat was all loaded for a couple of days which left a lingering scent that I look forward to now every time I head for the car. It is like one of those tree-shaped air-fresheners that you hang on the mirror, only better. I considered for a while not putting the garlands up on the house, but just continuing to drive around with them in the back seat like a passenger. Guessing that would be a bit odd, I thought of dressing it up in a Santa suit, which would work given the fact i drive the Crown Victoria, (AKA Das Boot) which already looks like a Taxi...but suppose that going everywhere with a big stuffed Santa in the back might strike an observer as odd - especially if I were to be asked about it and I were to reply that I keep him there because he smells good.



So I took them out and hung them on the porch. There is a substantial array of needles and sticks still in the carpet in the back which I suppose I ought to vacuum out - but hey this is Oregon, the car is supposed to look like it just drove out of a forest, right?



I wonder though, why can't anyone make the tree-shaped things smell like that? They tend to smell a bit obnoxious and definitely chemical. Why don't they make them hollow and just stuff them with cedar needles instead of the undoubtedly-toxic stuff they have in them? I'd buy one. In fact the thought of using the little shape to hold natural scents that just match up with a car's personality leads me to all kinds of ideas - how about coffee beans? Maybe French Fries? Or cookies - which when hit by sunshine or the heat from the the dashboard vents would emit the smell of chocolate chips right out of the oven? Or for the dog, maybe some dessicated liverwurst?

It is just such a shame that the makers of these things don't think far enough out of the box. Who cares about dead-flower smell or lab-made pine. I remember when I was a kid, unbeknownst to my dad I brought some live sand-dollars back from the beach, under the seat of the car. The smell lasted a very long time. I don't think he appreciated it as much as I did - frankly I thought it a really good reminder of where we had been - a lasting souvenir if you will. The thought comes now of a little tree shape stuffed with kelp and beach sand.

Ah, but the best ideas go undiscovered don't they. We all have to bow to the common ideal. So I guess I will have to settle for getting up and heading out to the car to drive to Starbucks. Cedar and coffee. Does it get any better than that?