Success didn't spoil me; I've always been insufferable.

- Fran Lebowitz



I have been following the plight of America's Sweetheart, Paris Hilton. Poor Paris. She is just so misunderstood, and now she is off to the slammer. Hard Time. 45 days for Criminal Spoildness. As if taking away her Bently was not enough. Andjust after she gave away her pet rat.

Oh that was a dog.

Anyway, times are hard for our American Icons...and it was not as if Paris had not already put in her time; after all there was that TV series where she schlepped through the hard life, scrubbing floors and selling cheeseburgers. And it's not like she killed anybody. Not that we know of. All we know is that she has represented an ideal, a razor-thin anemic clotheshanger that managed to camp it up in front of the camera and who got paid hundreds of thousands of dollars for 10-minute personal appearances to class up parties.

Obviously the judge was just jealous. Oh well though, I think Paris had already declared that she was just months away from dropping out of public life. Maybe while she's in the tank she can learn how to knit - she might just come up with a new sweater craze like Martha Stewart did when she emerged.

I can't wait. Meanwhile the dog might be able to get a job at Taco Bell.